Tuesday, 6 November 2012

Plastic fantastic

I often wonder what type of man actually buys a blow up doll, I mean really some of them don't even look like real women - they look like a molded bit of plastic with a big gaping hole in the front of the head!!
However when you look at some of the girls that go round now adays really some of them are just glorified, walking talking blow up dolls....

Men go out to a bar or club (or where ever you go to pull these days) & go for the picture perfect looking girls - nice figure (arse & tits) & pretty face. They go to all the effort of trying to chat them up, buy them a drink etc all in the hope of a blow job or a shag, hey maybe even just a lick on the end of the head it all counts (got to have something to tell the lads after all).
Anyway imagine their horror when they wake up in the morning (pretend they have been that lucky - work with me here) in bed next to a completely different girl. He rubs his eyes looking around the room & see's strips of hair laying on the arm of the chair, eye lashes on the dresser, chicken fillets (bra fillers or fake slip in boobs for those that don't know!) on the floor with her underwear & nails on her bedside cabinet. When he looks at the person in the bed it appears he has slept with Sinead O'Conner & not Pamerla Anderson who he actually left the club with....

Personally I call that false advertising, making guys think you look one why then taking it all off to reveal a complete other person. The real woman gets my vote everytime, i'm all for taking care of yourself, grooming & making an effort but there are limits.
I mean you can get fake everything these days - even a fake arse!! Thats right, if you don't want to permanently look like Kim Kardashian by getting a butt implant then you can get these special pants that have butt lift panels in them. Somewhere there is some poor soul pulling a girl thinking his luck is in as he is an arse not a boob man, his eyes light up as he imagines banging it out from behind only for her arse to be left in her clothes when she takes them off - tut tut ladies.

I am actually starting to think that men would be better of getting a blow up doll, at least they know what they are getting, exactly what it says on the pack. Then if she bursts or gets a puncture they won't be surprised.    

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