Everybody needs good neighbours

What annoys you most about your neighbours? Well a survey has found loud lovemaking to be the biggest pet peeves when it comes to the Jones' next door. Is there anything more annoying than this?

This is what featured both on the This Morning show & in The Sun newspaper last week, I mean come on really; who are these people they survey & where did they find them – in a convent?! I for one can think of hundreds of things that are more annoying about neighbours (their dog shitting in your garden is near the top of my list). So what if you hear your neighbours every now & then going hammer & tongs at it – I for one would salute them & may even high five them over the fence while hanging the washing out. People who moan about things like that are either prudes or they are jealous they are not getting any.

Bear in mind though just because someone screams loader between the sheets then they do at Alton Towers doesn’t mean they are enjoying it. Some people do it affect as they think that is what their partner wants to hear, I’m sure this must be a turn off. Everyone likes to hear that the other person is enjoying it but they don’t want to go deaf in the process.

On the reverse it must also be a turn off if someone just lays there silent & like a plank of wood, especially if the lights are out. I mean how would you know if they are enjoying it? Not sure if when you are in the throws of things how you can hold it in when you are about to orgasm, as even if you try to hold it in somehow a little moan manages to slip out.

So it’s best to remember that screaming can not only put your neighbours off their cocoa but is best left at the theme parks or to the porn stars :o)

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